Rachel Friedmann

Laziness is the inspiration of invention. This idea keeps floating around, it seems that most technology’s purpose is for our convenience. The internet allows for us to more quickly communicate, find old friends, shop, send messages, find information, find a job, and the list goes on. Look at phone applications – all convenience related. Cars, the simple answer is that they make it more convenient to get around, but what about all the bells and whistles? Safety features may not at first appear to be a convenience, but think about the fact that if you were to get in a car accident you would have the ease of walking away with less harm to yourself and the car.

Even our phones, the more advanced they get, the capabilities allow us to have more conveniences – contact information, internet, email, calendars…The one problem with all this advanced technology is that we are expected to be on all the time – always connected. It is hard to stay away from these technological conveniences. In the grand scheme of things, is having all of this technology in our lives make our lives better or more stressful?

I am constantly learning about the latest marketing techniques and what’s going on in the world online. I recently attended Association Bisnow’s Digital Strategies breakfast, where half the attendees were busy tweeting on their smartphones! One of the recommendations from the breakfast was that a White Paper could be turned into 3-months of tweets. My eyes began rolling.

Twitter has become one of the fastest ways to receive up-to-date information and one of the biggest regurgitaters of information. Many “Tweeters” link to interesting articles, retweet others thoughts, or are blogging/tweeting so fast that the focus becomes quantity instead of quality. In essence, they do not have a strategy behind what they are doing; they are just reacting. As in any type of marketing or PR campaign, traditional or new, strategy is vital and should not be ignored.

I constantly advise clients that all social media tools are not right for everyone. Not everyone needs a facebook, twitter, blog, linkedin, youtube, etc they should think about what the purpose is first, where their audience is looking online, and of course create a strategy. This great article sums up my sentiments http://www.whatsnextblog.com/archives/2010/09/top_10_reasons_your_company_shouldnt_blog_redux.asp

Strategy. Strategy. Strategy. It is the biggest thing missing in online marketing today. Before you start tweeting 20 tweets a day, decide what your purpose is and go from there! Remember this social media is one more way to communicate with your audience.

People throw this term around a lot and as someone who does social media as part of her job I decided to further explore the definition. When I started my search, I immediately found a great blog post from 2008 “What I Want a Social Media Expert to Know.” I was pleased to to know that I could quickly check off everything on his list, but I wanted to delve deeper into the definition on my own.

As someone with a marketing background, I apply traditional marketing to anything I do on the web. From understanding your audience, to knowing what will be value added content; there is more to social media than just knowing how to set up a blog, SEO, or knowing all the names of the most popular social networking sites.

One under-recognized area is the building of relationships both on and off line. One of the quickest ways to get recognized and bring traffic to your site is by conversing with others. I like to think of Malcolm Gladwell who discusses how influencers, mavens, and connectors can move ideas. One of the keys to success in online marketing is connecting with the influencers in your industry. As I am writing this, I typed into Google “gladwell influencers” and one of the first links was Increasing Social Media ROI Using Gladwell’s Tipping Point Framework

Apparently, I am not the first to think of this idea. This is a great slideshow that shows how to bring Gladwell’s ideas into your social media strategy.

Since I can and do this, I will call myself a social media connector/maven for now.

10-15 years ago, I would never have imagined having text message conversations with my parents. Today, it is a great way to communicate without having to phone each other to share something that could easily be shared in a quick message. For instance, my parents recently took in a puppy. They had waited a few months since the beloved almost 17-year-old family dog had passed, before starting their search. To ensure they received family input, we received numerous pictures sent straight to our phones of potential pet siblings. Finally, they decided on a sweet puppy named Danny.

After being a Friedmann for about a month, Danny was raced to the emergency room for seizures followed by fluid-filled lungs. Today, Danny is at home being weaned off his meds. During the ordeal, my parents kept in touch via phone and yes, text message.

The poor vets probably had to smile. Everytime they walked into the room, my parents had to quickly get off their phones. Obviously, this is one example of many with my parents, but it is interesting to see how relationships and staying in touch has changed drastically. Now, to get M&D new phones with QWERTY keyboards…

“Along with other ‘noisy’ aspects of modern life, such excessive background social stimulation is very likely part of the reason why we see increasing levels of mental illness in most societies…the WHO expects that by 2020 mental illness will be the second most important cause of disability and morality worldwide…with the most common being anxiety disorder.” (See pages 120-121 in Pandora’s Seed)

The evolutionary psychologist Robin Dunbar showed that the average group size is closely related to brain size in various animal species. The larger the brain, the larger the group size because the brain can then keep track of more social connections or relationships. The human-sized brain is predicted at 150 for group sizes. This group size is found everywhere from military to hunter-gather bands. According to Dunbar, it isn’t that we cant remember more than this number; it’s a matter of what relationships are considered meaningful. We can remember up to 2,000 people, but 150 is the cap for meaningful relationships – hmm…did you just go and check your Facebook friend count?

Above the number of 150 it is hard to treat everyone the same way you would in a smaller group. In the past, communities have been known to spilt after they arrive at 150 members for this reason. We begin dehumanizing one another with passing comments – example: Facebook birthday posts. These passing acknowledgments are relatively meaningless. Our minds can’t handle that many social interactions and therefore we begin by dehumazing each other even in close quarters – think planes, hallways, sidewalks, and subways. People look at their blackberries or the floor to avoid having even more interactions than we already do. According to Wells’ in his book Pandora’s Seed, these are the reasons for the steepening increase in mental illness- we can’t handle the social interaction overload. Think about the number of email, social networking, and calendars we have to keep track of – its enough for even the calmest person to get anxious.

The only suggestion is to cut out the excess in our lives or create our own split – um, is that possible? I guess that’s why so many people are hiring others to handle their social media.

I first learned about Dunbar’s Rule or the Rule of 150 in Malcolm Gladwell’s book The Tipping Point. He states that the optimal number of individuals in a society that someone can have real social relationships with is 150, therefore companies and communities are most effective when they are less than 150 in number. I challenge anyone to sit down and write down the name of everyone you are in regular contact with – friends and family. This should not include all 1000 of your Facebook fans.

I am an avid reader and have to get in my fix of easy reading. I was surprised when I read in Cosmo magazine that we only really keep in touch and have relationships with 150 of our friends on Facebook. In Spencer Well’s Pandora’s Seed, he makes a connection between our hunter-gather ancestors and Facebook. In his book, he states that the average number of friends people have on Facebook is 130, just under the 150 cut off. Therefore, for the majority of Facebook users that want to stay in touch and share with those they have the closest relationships with just like bands of hunter-gathers that didn’t go behind that count in their groups.

The next time you think about adding another Facebook friend, consider whether or not they fall within your 150? I know I probably won’t….

I first heard of the no asshole policy during an interview – “we don’t hire and we don’t have clients, who are assholes.” I loved the idea so when I heard there was book, I had to pick it up from the library. In Robert I. Sutton’s book, The No Asshole Rule: Building a Civilized Workplace and Surviving One That Isn’t, he has a few gems advice thrown in amidst  a plethora of scientific research.

Although, the book intends to facilitate navigating a difficult work environment, his advice can also be used in social media. He quotes Univ. of Michigan’s Karl Weick “Fight as if you are right, listen as if you are wrong.” At Intel they use this model for having constructive arguments in order to help facilitate a better working environment and to lose less time over small emotional arguments. I agree that this is great advice for not only the workplace, but in our everyday interactions.

Of course, I always think about how advice like this can be related back to the wonderful world of the web. Many companies set up Twitter and other social networking accounts to help subdue upset clients, respond to customer inquires, and/or found out how to offer better services or products. I think that anyone who is handling social media should also consider Karl Weick’s advice. One of things many forget to do while online is to really listen to their customers, not just react. Listen as though you are wrong; in the eyes of an upset customer you are.

In this telecommuting world, many meetings are being conducted using information technologies. Sutton’s book references a study by Stanford’s Pamela Hinds and Diane Bailey showing that conflict can be higher and trust lower when information technologies are used rather than face-to-face meetings.  Emails and phone calls provide little information in the form of facial and body language cues and verbal intonations. Without in-person interactions, it is easier for people to create overtly negative opinions of one another. I have longed believed that not meeting in person can lead to more miscommunication. How often have you or a co-worker misread in an email and then had to deal with the consequences? See my blog post: Miscommunication via Email

And one last gem, not related to the internet. A good way to assess an organization or detect whether a co-worker is an “asshole” is to listen for the word we instead of I or me in meetings and conversations.

I worry about today’s younger generation and the generations to come. I can’t imagine being in middle school or high school and having a Facebook profile. Not only do kids these days have to worry about what they’re wearing, and the popular kids, but also promoting themselves online. I’ve heard that trying to put your emotions into words for a status update is not a healthy psychological activity. Trying to identify so concisely and then feel the need to share with the world is not how we naturally operate. The younger generation no longer gets a break from social pressure when they get home from school because they immediately go online and have a second environment in which to compete with each other.

As for adults, when we have a problem or issue, or even great news we no longer call our friends immediately, we post it on Facebook and wait for a response. I have heard arguments for and against posting sonogram pictures and post-birth images of the baby before they have been cleaned off. It’s great that we share but sometimes we go overboard. We are also in the same trap as the younger generations, always being on and feeling the need to share. I understand that it is great relief for some to share their news instantaneously online with everyone, but what happened to the good old fashioned phone call?

I was first introduced to this idea in Tim Ferriss’ book “Four-Hour Work Week,” but I’ve still not mastered it. We are all to tied to our e-mail, Facebook, and Twitter. It eats up most of our time and makes us less productive. I was talking to a friend recently who sets times each day to check her e-mail in an effort to become more productive at work. For those of you, you may be considering it, check out Tim Ferriss’ blog post “How to Check E-mail Twice a Day… or Once Every 10 Days” for tips on e-mails and autoresponders to start checking your e-mail less often during the day and having more time for more important things.

Now if only I could follow his advice.